


In This Love That Fails

by xDinahQueenx



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M, Infidelity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-22
Updated: 2013-11-22
Packaged: 2018-01-02 08:25:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1054618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xDinahQueenx/pseuds/xDinahQueenx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>"I don't want to talk about it," Aaron said. He saw the way her face shifted, the little frown, the way her lashes lowered and the way she turned slightly away. </em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	In This Love That Fails

"You know we cannot keep doing this," Alex's voice was quiet in the hotel room, against the open window and the sounds of traffic outside. Over the soft noise of a late not talk show that flickered blue over her body. The sheets were bunched down at the end of the bed. Aaron's fingers stroked over her bare hip. He reached over and pushed her hair behind her ear and looked down at her. His thumb brushed over her cheek and Alex gave him a small, maybe pained smile.   
  
Aaron shook his head.   
  
"I don't want to talk about it," Aaron said. He saw the way her face shifted, the little frown, the way her lashes lowered and the way she turned slightly away. Aaron wanted to apologize, although he didn't. Instead, his twisted locks of Alex's dark hair between his fingers and tried to not notice the little sigh that she let out that stirred the hair on his chest.   
  
She didn't bring it up again, though, so he leaned in, twisting in an awkward sort of angle to brush his lips over her forehead. She shifted a little, knee sliding up and then she was straddling his thighs again and her hair formed a curtain as she leaned in to kiss him.   
  
Aaron considered the matter settled and he let the conversation die there.   
  
*              *              *  
  
If Aaron was home on Sunday, Beth would come over in the morning with coffee for him and herself, and a fruit smoothie for Jack because it was _special_ , and Jack loved it. They made their way to the park and almost every time the Wallace's were walking their dog and they'd waste a half an hour just chatting with them as Jack pet the little golden retriever.   
  
Then in the afternoon, they'd gather back in Aaron's apartment, where they would make lunch and they would squeeze on to the couch with Jack and watch movies. Sometimes they'd go out for dinner, or sometimes they'd make something together, or sometimes order in. And when Jack went to sleep, he'd spend the remainder of the evening on the couch—or in bed—with Beth.   
  
Jack loved Beth and Beth loved Jack; she was a great woman and Aaron loved her. It made him feel worse about the betrayal.   
  
He hadn't thought he'd be the type to cheat, but here it was. When he thought about it, he'd hold Beth closer to him. She would give him a little questioning smile.   
  
"It's not important." Aaron told her. It ended the discussion.   
  
It didn't make him feel good.   
  
*              *              *  
  
It would always start the same way, too.   
  
"We can't," Alex would whisper against his lips, and he'd agree with her. But it didn't stop him from pressing in, from wrapping his arms around her to pull her close. Aaron loved the way she felt against him, warm and soft curves, and the way she smelled.   
  
Her perfume was intoxicating; or maybe it was just her. Aaron couldn't tell, he wasn't sure it made a difference anyways.   
  
"Aaron," Her voice was a mix between pleading and warning. It always was. But she'd kiss him then, put her hands on his shoulders and press in. Aaron never resisted. Why would he? Except for all the reasons he _should_ , he couldn't help himself.   
  
Aaron could say he was smitten. It didn't _excuse_ anything.   
  
He didn't love her. (He didn't think.)    
  
*              *              *  
  
When she ended it, and Aaron wasn't surprised when she did, he was heartbroken.   
  
He wanted to beg her to stay. It was so ridiculous that he wanted to.   
  
Aaron stood in her empty living room, thinking of the things he might tell her. How much he wanted her and needed her and how she couldn't—shouldn't—leave.   
  
He kept the words behind his teeth, though, even as he watched her gather up her things It wasn't like Aaron's entire world was on tilt, but he wished he could tell her all the things that he wanted to say. But Aaron wasn't good at things like that and it'd probably come out wrong anyways.   
  
"But I love you," Aaron had said.   
  
It should have been enough, shouldn't it have?   
  
"Aaron," Her voice was only pleading now. He wished he had the words to say, some place to put his hands, to fix this. To make it so she wouldn't go.   
  
Aaron wondered if this was his fault, standing here, watching her pack away the last of it. To where nothing remained on the walls and the furniture was gone. Aaron knew it was his fault.   
  
"This is what you really want?" Aaron demanded and she'd given him a sad smile then.   
  
"No, it isn't, but I… I have to Aaron," Alex said. She kissed him again (for the last time) and she didn't linger. Alex was leaving him. Not just ending their fling, but _leaving_ , to Harvard.  
  
Maybe it was as uncontrollable for her. Aaron knew it was for the best and he walked her out to her car.   
  
"Is there anything I can do to convince you to stay?" Aaron asked, suddenly, and feeling helpless. He didn't like when things were out of his control; but he never minded with Alex. But this part of it—this part, he wasn't fond of.   
  
"I told you, Aaron, we couldn't keep doing this. Since I wasn't able to resist, or stick to that, it does have to be this way." Alex opened the car door and slid in. Aaron listened to the engine turn over, then the whine of the window rolling down.   
  
"For what it's worth," Alex said, "I think I loved you too." She pulled out of the driveway then, leaving Aaron there. When he went home, finally, after waiting there in vain hope she'd change her mind, he called Beth and cancelled their standing Sunday date.   
  
Jack went to his cousins for the day.   
  
And Aaron drowned his heartbreak in a bottle of whiskey. 


End file.
